Funny Bleach Episode 7
by RukiaLady94
Summary: Sometimes dreams are too real and too crazy. Lol


Funny Bleach Episode 7 Part 1: Amnesia?

[It`s a beautiful night. Rukia, Rangiku, Yoruichi and Soifon are having a sleepover in Rukia`s bedroom]

Rangiku: Alright listen up, girls. I officially open our very first Sleepover of this year by announcing a couple of rules. There will be no drinking, no trash talk about the boys, no hot Yaoi magazines and no babbling about boys we like.

Yoruichi: You gotta be freaking kidding me. Then why are we having a sleepover in the first place? It`s like having a monkey party with no bananas.

Rangiku: I`m just joking around. We can do whatever we want.

Soifon: Now that`s more like it. Hey Ice Girl, you seem awfully quiet today.

Rangiku: Yeah, what`s wrong Ice Princess?

Yoruichi: Godess, Rangiku. Ice Godess.

Rukia: I don`t know. I`m just thinking about some stuff that`s been going on lately.

Soifon: What`s on your mind?

Rukia: Nothing. I just don`t feel like talking about it. You girls go on ahead.

Rangiku: Well this is boring. You want to be left alone?

Rukia: Yeah, I`m tired anyway. Maybe I`ll join you some other night.

Yoruichi: Alright let`s go have this sleepover in my room then. My room`s bigger (laughs) Rukia, feel free to come join us if you change your mind.

Soifon: Yeah. See you later.

[They all walk out of Rukia`s bedroom]

Rukia: What am I so worried about? This isn`t like me at all. (sleeps on her bed)

[The next morning]

Rukia: Wow. What a great sleep. I feel so good today. And the best part is, I got no worries. (smiles)

[Rukia takes a shower, changes clothes and goes to the girl`s hangout room]

Rukia: Hey everyone. Isn`t this a wonderful day?

[Rangiku is laying on the cough, reading Yuri magazines]

Rangiku: It sure is. Wow. Soo hot. (drools)

[Yoruichi is sitting on cough, reading Hentai magazines]

Yoruichi: Hey Rukia. (reads) Wow.

Rukia: What the- why are you reading Yuri, Rangiku?

Rangiku: You`re kidding, right? Yuri is so hot and sweet. I read it all day long.

Yoruichi: Yeah and I read Hentai magazines. `Cause it`s hot and makes me think about Kisuke. (smiles)

Rukia: But you never used to read Yuri and you never liked Hentai. What happened to Yaoi?

Rangiku: Eww. Grose. Boy on boy? Not really my thing.

Rukia: But..you`re reading Yuri, wich is girl on girl. It`s not that different from Yaoi.

Yoruichi: Yeah, there is. Yuri hot, Yaoi not hot. (reads) Besides, we always read Yuri magazines. Like yesterday.

Rukia: Yesterday? Yesterday I read Yaoi not Yuri.

Rangiku: Oh dear, you must be joking. You love Yuri just as much as we do. We can`t get enough of it. Just go ask Renji.

Rukia: Renji? What`s he got to do with this.

Rangiku: Helloo? He`s your boyfriend. He knows you very well.

Rukia: WHA? He`s not my-my boyfriend.

Renji: Hey sweety (kisses her) How are you today? Did you have a nice sleep?

Rukia: Why did you kiss me? I was never your girlfriend and have you girls lost your minds? I don`t know what happened to you but you are not, well..you!

Renji: Sweetheart, just calm down. What`s wrong? You girls love Yuri.

Rukia: Uh-newsflash..we dont! We love Yaoi, goddamnit!

Rangiku: I think she`s losing her mind.

Yoruichi: Did you drink too much last night? `Cause you`re acting kinda weird, Rukia. Here, just have a nice cup of tea and relax and try to remember.

Rukia: Look! I don`t need a cup of tea! I need someone to tell me what the hell is going on here. Yesterday you loved Yaoi and today you love Yuri and you act as if you loved it for a long time. And I don`t remember being your girlfriend `cause I`m not! The last thing I said to you was; "SHOO"! And it was yesterday before I went to bed completely worried!

Renji: Wow. You remember things that happened to us 3 years ago?

Rukia: 3 years ago? Oh god (faints)

Rangiku: We got a girl down, girl down. Over.

Yoruichi: Poor Rukia. It`s like she forgot everything these past 3 years in just one night.

Renji: Yeah. It`s weird too. I hope she`s okay. Looks like we gotta fill in the blanks for her.

[Rukia is sleeping in Unohana`s room]

[Rukia wakes up]

Rukia: What happened to me?

Unohana: You passed out. Tell me, Rukia. What was the last thing that you remember before today?

Rukia: Well it was that day when Rangiku`s bird died and she kept trying to kill you and later that day I called Byakuya `cause Renji was bothering me. And then I shood him. Then later that night I went to bed worried and woke up today and saw all of this.

Unohana: Wow, it seems that you`ve forgotten everything of these last 3 years.

Rukia: What? But how can I just sleep and wake up 3 years later with no memory of those years? That`s so weird because I can clearly remember that all those things happened yesterday. I didn`t forget anything, Uno. You have to believe me!

Unohana: I`m trying to. Believe me. We are gonna help you as much as we can so that we can figure out what happened to you.

Rukia: Okay.

Unohana: Don`t worry. Everything is gonna be okay (hugs her)

[Rangiku breaks the door open and hugs Rukia]

Rangiku: Rukia you`re okay!

Rukia: I`m seeing stars, seeing stars... (turns blue)

Unohana: I`m not paying for that door, Rangiku.

Rangiku: woops. Sorry. (gigles) My bad.

Rukia: Well, at least you guys still got the same funny attitudes.

[Later at the hangout room]

Rangiku: Alright, Rukia. We are gonna do everything in our power to help you recover your memory back.

Yoruichi: Yup. Now let`s start with why suddenly according to Rukia, we started loving Yuri and hate Yaoi.

Rukia: Okay. That was the first thing I had on my mind. Go on.

Rangiku: Well, I guess we`re gonna have some horrible flashbacks.

[Flashback as Rangiku starts to explain what happened 3 years ago, the day after Rukia`s sleep]

Rangiku: I was walking and singing happily when all of the sudden, I saw it.

[Rukia`s voice]

Rukia: Saw what.

Rangiku: Shh! I`m telling a story here?

Rukia: Oh right, sorry. Go on.

Rangiku: Now, as I was saying. I saw it.

And if you really really want to know what she saw, then too bad. `Cause you`re gonna have to wait for part 2. Lmao.

To Be Continued...

Funny Bleach Episode 7 Part 2: Just A Dream?

Rangiku: Now, as I was saying. I saw it.

[Flashback]

[Rangiku is singing and walking peacefully]

Rangiku: What a beautiful day. (keeps walking and then she sees an abandoned motel) Hm? I`ve never seen this place before. (she walks in and goes upstairs) Hm? What is that banging sound? (hears it again) It`s coming from this room (opens the door and sees Gin and Old man Yammamoto kissing with no clothes on)

Rangiku: Oh no, I think I`m gonna be sick. Eww! (runs out) Oh my god. I should tell the girls..but I don`t think they`ll believe me. Unless I film it so they can see. (goes back and films them)

[End of flashback]

Rangiku: And then I showed you guys and we found it too discussting. And that`s why we hate Yaoi. Especially me. Everytime I see Yaoi or two men kissing, I get those freaky-discussting pictures in my head.

Rukia: Wow. Alright, what`s next?

Yoruichi: I will tell you why I suddenly got interessted in Hentai. And it was..all Kisuke`s idea-I swear (puts innocent face) That`s it. (laughs)

Renji: Not helping. Alright. Now I will explain to Rukia why she`s my girlfriend or how she became my girlfriend. You ready?

Rukia: Okay, tell me.

Renji: What happened was this. We fell in love.

Rukia: That`s it? But how is that gonna make me remember?

Renji: Hey that was 3 years ago. Do you really think that I would remember that?

Rukia: You should..damn. I still don`t remember. What else is new that I don`t know about?

Rangiku: I secretly go see Hitsugaya 7 times a night.

Rukia: I think you mean a day. And that`s not a bad thing.

Rangiku: I mean at night because I only sneak to see him at night...when I`m ... you know. (rolls eyes)

Rukia: Oookay...too much information. Back on topic, people..

Yoruichi: Let`s see..oh yeah! Soifon is dead.

Rukia: WHAT! Is that even possible? What happened?

Yoruichi: Well everything was going fine..until she wanted to fly...

[Flashback]

Yoruichi: Hey soifon. Whatcha doing on top of that airplane?

Soifon: I`m going to prove to everbody that I can fly.

Yoruichi: Uh..you sure? You might get hurt.

Soifon: That`s nonesence! I can fly. Wish me luck. (plane takes off)

Yoruichi: Oh dear. (covers eyes)

Soifon: Come on, go higher! Yeah. Up-up and awaaaaay..(jumps while singing) I believe I can flyyy (falls flat on the ground and dies)

[BOOOOM!]

Yoruichi: Oh crap. (covers eyes)

[End of flashback]

Rukia: Oh My God! That`s awful, and I didn`t get to say goodbye to her.

Soifon: To who?

[Rukia turns around]

Rukia: WHAAA! You-You`re alive! (hugs her)

Soifon: Yeah, I am. Why-what did they tell you?

Yoruichi: Nothing (slowly backs away)

Rukia: She said you died trying to fly.

Soi: Oh she did, did she? You`re so dead, you furball. I don`t care if I admire and love you! (grabs shotgun and starts shooting at Yoruichi while running after her) Where are you going, coward! The party`s over here! (shoots)

Yoruichi: Stop shooting at me, you crazy woman! (still running and dodging the bullets)

Rukia: Haha. That`s funny. Well, I`m gonna go to bed now. It`s getting late.

Renji: Yeah. We`ll figure out what to do tomorrow. Goodnight.

Rukia: Rangiku? (turns around and sees Rangiku sleeping like a baby with her thumb in her mouth)

[Rukia sleeps on her bed]

Rukia: What if I did forget...(hears shotgun shooting and closes her eyes)

[The next morning]

Rangiku: Girl, you better get up. Can you hear me?

Yoruichi: Rukia, get up. You`ve been asleep for a whole day.

Soifon: I`ll wake her up. (grabs baseball bat)

Rukia wakes up: Wha..what.. WHAAA!

[They all start screaming]

Rangiku: Geez. Why did you scream, Rukia?

Rukia: I wake up and the first thing I see are three big heads staring at me with big eyes. I thought I was on the moon. And...what`s up with that bat?

Soifon: Uh...nothing. (quikly puts it away)

Rangiku: Rukia you`re alive! (hugs her)

Rukia: Why, shouldn`t I be? What`s going on?

Yoruichi: You were asleep the whole day and didn`t wake up.

Soifon: Yeah.

Rukia: Wait. I was asleep? Was yesterday the day I went to bed worried and you girls were having the sleepover in Yoruichi`s room?

Rangiku: Uh yeah, duh. That was awesome, by the way. What happened to you?

Rukia: Does that mean that I was dreaming all this time? But it was so real!

Soifon: What were you dreaming about?

Rukia: You wouldn`t believe me if I told you. I`m just happy to be here again.

Yoruichi: Did something strange happen in that dream that got you like this?

Rukia: Yeah. It was soo scary and crazy. Come on. Let`s walk around while I tell the story.

Rangiku: Cool. Do I get a magazine to read afterwards?

Rukia: ...sure.

Rangiku: YAY!

[They start walking]

The End

It got you crazy too, didn`t it? Lol. 


End file.
